Recent experiences with people and their reactions to some of the circumstances has left a permanent dent in my life, I love people, I love the dynamics of different individuals and also the fact that they teach us a lot, either what we should do or what we should not do, there is something to learn from everyone.
Not all the people who come into our lives stay for long-haul, some have short visit pass and some leave mid-way.. Whatever the time frame of their presence in our life they sure do teach us a lot.
I had recent experience of a very good friend turning aloof and silent, and it was beyond my comprehension to know the reason for the same. It obviously starts off with anger and resentment and turmoil in your own head to understand why a person is behaving the way he or she is behaving and no matter how hard one tries to reason things out there is a vacuum in one’s head which never gets filled and that’s the vacuum which is looking for closure of sorts.
Its ok for people to fall out of any relationship but what is key is to communicate the reason and come to some sort of closure so that the process of healing and letting go can start.
But some people are so complicated and their lives so complicated that they just refuse to face difficult conversations, few years back may be I would have done the same, I would have preferred to maintain silence instead of communicating but having gone through various phases in corporate world and personal life I have realized that communication is so important to make the other person realize how you feel about a situation rather than holding and carrying the baggage all along.
It is so important for our own peace and happiness that we drop the unnecessary baggages of hate, resentment and anger, it is important to de clutter our minds with all the things which are not of any importance for our self-growth and happiness.
For me the way to De-clutter has been to firstly forgive the person who has hurt and disrespected me and then let go of that person from my heart and mind forever, this is the only way to closure and way to look forward.
There is no point in dissecting the situation as this is not going to revive the relationship, if the other person has decided to go then there is no point in you trying to hold on.. We don’t question when people come into our life and the same way we should not question when they leave.
What also has helped me is also to understand and reflect on what this person and situation has taught me, I try to look for all the positives and take that as life lesson learnt and move forward.
And here I would like to quote a nice write I came across on FB,although not for soul mates, this can be applied to anyone who comes into our lives :-
“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.
A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master...”
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love
Some people are sent by god to our lives to help shake things up so that we see a new path, a new direction in our life that we would never have known otherwise and we need to make sure we don’t sulk on why this person left instead should look forward to this new direction and look at life with renewed energy and zest..
I do not wish too many people come into my life who hurt me and act indifferent but even if they do all I can do is to look for the pieces which will enhance my life and move forward.
We have only one life to live and the time to brood over something that’s over should be short, we need to pick up the pieces and gather ourselves together quickly and face life head on with the newly gained wisdom and confidence……
Some quotes on this topic :-
“There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won’t anymore, and who always will. So don’t worry about people from your past, there’s a reason why they didn’t make it to your future.” Author Unknown
"Some friends come and go like a season. Others are arranged in our lives for good reason." ---Sharita Gadison
